March 31

Quote of the Day

What you are is a question only you can answer.

Lois McMaster Bujold

And the thing is...the answer doesn't have to be a multiple choice, all-inclusive, never-changing. It's like a philosophy answer.You can keep going, going, going, and discuss it, mold it, discover it, and love the process, rather than getting to an ultimate truth.

March 30

Quote of the Day

My home is not a place,

it is people.

Lois McMaster Bujold

With both my roommate and me not having any family or our closest friends around, it could be seen as counterproductive to having this hung on our wall as a reminder of "Hey, this will never be your home; your home - aka your people - are far far away."

Yet, somehow it brings this sense of calm. In two ways, actually. One, it reminds me that no matter where I am, I'll always have a home with those I love. Two, it reminds me that by surrounding myself with loving and awesome people, I can have a home wherever I go.

New York is slowly starting to form into a home for me, and it is definitely due to the people I meet, talk to, spend time with, and stick to. People who make the amazingness of this City actually noticeable, useful, enjoyable. People who bring the party to the City that never sleeps. People who bring the "home" to my piece of the big apple.

My home is not bound to a house, a plot of land, or a native country. My home is worldwide, and what is sweet about that is that in a way, it lets me be in several places at once.

Don't ask me what that means, but hey, it's 3.13am.

March 29

Quote of the Day

It's better to burn out than to fade away.

Neil Young

Thank you mr. Young. Thank you.

This was much needed, and got me thinking about why I'm really going through all this insanity, and in doing so, made it that much more tolerable.

At least for a day.

March 28

Quote of the Day

Every moment is a golden one for him who has the vision to recognize it as such.

Henry Miller

Today's run at Riverside park was glorious.

Probably not what mr. Miller primarily meant with "golden," but hey, the sunset alone would have qualified it as such!

Picture not mine. All rights to original source at: http://www.flickr.com/photos/boscdanjou/6232476201/

March 27

Quote of the Day.

If you smile at me I'll understand,

'cause that is something everybody everywhere does

in the same language.

Crosby, Stills, Nash

Yesterday was NOT a day of smiles.

But reading this quote in the morning did make me look at people's smiles all day long. Regardless that they weren't directed AT me in my non-smiley mood, but they still managed to brighten up my day a little.

So even when you don't feel like smiling, concentrate on those who are! Worth it!

Another thing to brighten up my least smile-filled days?

This man!

March 26

Quote of the Day

An honest man's pillow

is his peace of mind.

John Cougar Mellencamp

Ive had this discussion on a few occasions now.

I'm too honest. Whether it is about me telling someone how I feel too directly or stressing over midterms without accepting a little "cheat-ish" help from others on a take home exam, I get comments on how I don't need to be "THAT honest"...But I can't help it.

Blame my idealistic rearing or my overly developed conscience. Even blame my sky-high expectations of myself and those in relationship with me. But why would you blame someone for honesty, regardless of where its roots may lie? I sleep better at night after having upset someone with a comment about his or her ignorance in the last comment he or she made than after keeping my mind shut and maintaining the ignorant bliss. And that A wouldn't sweeten my dreams if it wasn't really my A at all, would it?

A case in point: Would finally getting the green light on staying and working in the U.S. be as sweet if I earned it through a fiscally arranged convenience-marriage? Probably not. Is this not-so-tiny-yet-not-so-impossible lie a lurking temptation at times? ....Hardly. I've been morphed into too much of a romantic for such monstrosities, but hey...That trapdoor is out there.

Sigh.

Maybe I'll get to better places with this honest approach to living, maybe I'll be more liked by those that matter in my life. Maybe I won't end up in the U.S., after all, and maybe this will be much better than any of my American dreams. But then again, maybe honesty will prevail and I'll win the green card lottery! Here's to honest hoping, praying, chanting, and finger crossing!

Good night.

ps. I've planted a few flower bushes, bought a tomato seedling, tons of seeds and soil, and made roadside discoveries for the roof. We've also began incorporating an "in the garden" song to everything imaginable with the roommate, but that's another story. Regardless, the infuriating split personality weather is gone off the deep end again, and garden plans are on hold. Pictures to follow.

March 25

Quote of the Day

It is possible to store the mind with a million facts

and still be entirely uneducated.

Alec Bourne

'Tis true.

But it can also be looked at through a narrow, stereotypical way of defining education.

Who says I can't be extremely educated in...say, random quotes or celebrity baby names?

What I find interesting is how it seems extremely more difficult to fill my mind with facts originating in school books than with whatever I read in Vogue. Why, brain, do you often work in such foolish, of-little-practical-use ways?

March 24

Quote of the Day

It is not necessary to understand things

in order to argue about them.

Pierre Beaumarchais

So true.

Isn't arguing really just a learning tool if done right?

Also..New York is in bloom! :)

March 23

Quote of the Day

I am fine.

Counting Crows

I am!

I am so glad I'm feeling fine. Midterms are moving along nicely, with the most stressful (hopefully) challenges and tasks behind me (for now), and I am feeling fine. There's still a ton to do every day, and there's a lot of deadlines and plans to do and meet during the rest of the spring, but after the last few weeks, this feels amazing.

AND my rooftop garden project is progressing day by day.....Exciting!

Now on to a great weekend (even if the weather doesn't cooperate with my mood)!

:)

March 22

Quote of the Day

An idea is salvation by imagination.

Frank Lloyd Wright

I've started working on a rooftop garden.

As of now, there is nothing up on the roof except a table I found curbside, but just plotting it out, planting various flowers and strawberries, picking out colors, and pure and simple letting my imagination run wild is relaxing.

Our kitchen/dining room is getting filled not only by greenery, but by soil and pots, and I'm feeling little childish giddiness hoping that my peonies will grow faster and faster and peeking into my eco-friendly trader-joes-bag-planters to see if any progress can be seen.

Over the weekend I'm hoping to takethe show outside as I'll finally have a little spare time on my hands, and maybe I'll even get a chance to go on a scavenger hunt for additional materials.

While a non-existent budget can be frustrating at times, I almost find it that much more fun to do what I can with what I have available on the streets thanks to the ever-so-generous people of New York.

Here's a little foretaste:

I can't wait to share the progress on here! :)

March 21

Quote of the Day

Fact #3748 that supports my love for you:

We cannot really love anybody with whom we never laugh.

Agnes Repplier

March 20

Quote of the Day

The body says what words cannot.

Martha Graham

Like: "Enough."

Or: "There's still something you need to figure out."

March 19

Quote of the Day

We hate some persons because we do not know them;

and we will not know them because we hate them.

Charles Caleb Colton

To be honest, I have very little to say about this quote.

I do feel, though, that it is important to give people a chance. Hatred usually arises from ignorance or from narrow, shallow ideas of what one is or is not based on belonging to a specific group, looking a certain way, or acting a certain way on a single occasion. I don't mean to say there is no justified feelings of hatred - ones rooted in true, thoroughly thought out and examined experiences and ideas of a person - but I do mean to underline the need for stepping back more often than not.

I don't think it is possible for us as human beings to be objective in our emotions or experiences, but even in our subjectivity, we can take a breath and an extra moment to look again, consider a little further, and make sure we are not jumping into conclusions or rushing into decisions about those around us on flimsy basis.

Because it would be sad to go through life hating someone you could've enjoyed and loved.

March 18

Quote of the Day.

Where facts are few,

experts are many.

D.R. Gannon

Isn't it funny how this is true in religion more so than in any field, when we're supposed to "humble [ourselves] in the sight of the Lord"?

March 17

Quote of the Day

Humanity can be quite cold

to those

whose eyes see the world

differently.

Eric A. Burns

Fill in the blanks with faces.

March 16

Quote of the Day

I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up.

Tom Lehrer

Oh God, don't get me started on this.

From obviously stupid people to Santorum, we're surrounded by people who'd just do better to all of humanity by keeping their thoughts to themselves. Or the lack thereof.

On the flip side, I take great pleasure in living in a society that emphasizes free speech. And in order to truly immerse myself in this way of living, in order to take pleasure in being allowed to hold my opinion, to proudly state my opinions, I have to allow others the same privilege. And this is what I'm trying to do. Yet, part of my opinion is this: if you have nothing but hate to spread with your words...if you have negativism, bad things, judgment, without points and reason to backthem up...what are you really saying?

And then this:

If only you would be altogether silent! For you, that would be wisdom.
(Job 13:5)

March 15

Quote of the Day

Eye contact is the best accessory.

Takayuki Ikkaku, Arisa Hosaka, and Toshihiro Kawabata in

"Animal Crossing"

Customer service people of New York, eyes on this quote, please!

This is one of the biggest truths of human life, if you ask me. It is so simple, yet so difficult to live up to. For whatever reason, people shy away fromeye contact.

I tend to make a point of looking people in the eye, smiling, nodding, greeting, when walking around town. But you can eventake the smiling, nodding, and greeting away, and just eye contact will make a huge difference. People respond to eye contact.

Okay, they respond in varying ways: suspicious and confused looks (I've gotten the "What are you smiling at?" smirk on more than a few occasions...), turning away, ignorance..But more often than not, people like it. They turn around and look at you for a split second longer, with an almost-smile twitching at the side of their mouth. Sometimes they even smile back, nod...talk! And that opens up a whole new bunch of sensations that can make your commute/morning/day/life just that tad bit brighter.

Eye contact also makes a world of difference when you look at a beautiful woman or a great looking man. Eye contact can change them from the cold bitch or stuck up jerk to an all encompassing hot flash in the middle of your dullest day. Mm-mm.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you make professional contacts, friends, lovers.

Open your eyes, and let the light in.

March 14

Quote of the Day

I never saw an ugly thing in my life.

John Constable

Here's to a different perspective, a sunnier outlook on life, and seeing beauty in every day.

Perfect for spring, and perfect for midterms.

The beauty of midterms is that they'll be over soon! (or maybe I should say that I get to show how much I know and test my learning...but, hey.)

Quotes of the past week.

March 13th

Today we're catching up on a week of quotes forgotten.

And as the weeks of madness still haven't come to a halt, we're doing this in fast forward.

You know that game where I ask you to say the first word that comes to mind after I say...

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic.

Dan Rather

Subwayfights.

Put yourself on view.

This brings your talents to light.

Baltasar Gracian

Kim K.

Screw us and we multiply.

Dorli Rainey

[Happy international women's day!]

Cockroaches.

There is no mistaking a real book when one meets it.

It is like falling in love.

Christopher Morley

A Book!!

Why be a man when you can be

a success?

Bertolt Brecht

America.

Let each man exercise the art he knows.

Aristophanes

Love.

The absence of flaw in beauty is itself a flaw.

Havelock Ellis

Scars.

A poem is never finished,

only abandoned.

Paul Valery

Character.

March 5

Quote of the Day

You can never underestimate

the stupidity of the general public.

Scott Adams

March 4

Quote of the Day

If you haven't found something strange during the day,

it hasn't been much of a day.

John A. Wheeler

We had a great Saturday walk with my love yesterday,

and while there were plenty of things to look at, take pictures of, and just enjoy,

perhaps the most memorable was this Chinese man,

who began to recite the history of Lin Ze, whose statue stands at theFive Points crossroads in Chinatown. We learned a lot, and his smile - though food, and whatnot filled - was heartwarming.

"Friend!Come!" he yelled, when he didn't want to stand to be photographed on his own :)

But speaking of strange things,

we shared a train ride home with a giant toy soldier.

March 3

Word of the Day

Assuage:

to soften or lessen the intensity

of something distressing or painful.

As the post from a few days ago may prove,

I've been feeling overworked, tired, and stressed lately. I feel out of energy, not up to completing all the tasks at hand or ahead, and unsure about which way to go.

And this is where the blessing that my bab is comes in. For a whole 9 days I get to come home to sleep in my love's arms, to have his encouragement, his input, his drive behind me. And while I've been upset about this coming week being filled with obligation after obligation, just as he is getting a chance to visit, I couldn't think of a better time to be blessed by his mere presence in my everyday life.

I can get a little overwhelmed and challenge-anxious, and no one can calm me down and make me breath easy (well, easier) like he can. So today, I thank God and I thank the universe and I thank my love for having him here in the coming days to assuage my stress.

March 2

Quote of the Day

It's good to be silly at the right moment.

Horace

This post comes late, as some of them do, but I have a great reason: My bab's here!!

So I've been busy enjoying being silly with my love <3

More about this in today's post.

March 1

Quote of the Day

Every big problem was at one time a wee disturbance.

Unknown

Tonight I am tired. Tired and overwhelmed, and slightly anxious about my overall life at the moment. Too many issues are crowding my coming days, and I'm having trouble navigating through all of it, without exhaustion, frustration, and doubts. I'm actually having trouble letting go of some of these things, which I'm working on, but before that happens, I struggle being in constant on-mode day after night after day after night.

Every big problem was at one time a wee disturbance. To the procrastinator me this reads as an accusation. You wouldn't feel this way if you had just started on all these things as they came along. To the philosopher me this could mean that no big problem is truly big. As we worry and give it room to grow, it becomes catastrophic, overwhelming, and takes over our everyday lives.

The solution could be to combine the two explanations and realize that no problem is truly as big as it feels, if only we catch it before it takes its toll on us, catch it before it grows, before time inflates the stress, catch it before our brains even grasp it as a problem, but simply a thing to quickly finish.

Now, I can write all these smart words, but the truth is I don't see the solution being that easy. When something is overwhelming, it's overwhelming, and you most often cannot reason your way into a peace of mind. So while I remain stressed and tired, I'll try not to think about all that needs to be done as much, and maybe give a little room for thoughts of change. And maybe by retirement, I'll do all that I described above successfully.

Baby steps, like they say.